Rock Star Ninja Warlock from Mars?

If you read my last post you know the market for top talent is tight.  To attract that talent means I spend a lot of word-smith time authoring job descriptions. Part of the challenge I face as a recruiter is when we get clients asking for resources it can be hard to accurately paint a picture of the job from the description provided.  Maybe I'm wrong, but descriptions like the following are so generic I don't see them as something that will get a top flight software engineer to reach out.

As a Java Developer, you will be enhancing systems created using the following technologies:  J2EE 1.5, Java Server Pages, Java Servlets, Struts, Javascript, HTML and XML.

SKILLS & QUALIFICATIONS REQUIRED:

• The ideal candidate must have atleast 3 years’ experience with Java development
• The ideal candidate must be well versed with J2EE, JavaScript and JSP
• The ideal candidate must be well versed with Unit testing.
• The ideal candidate must have experience working within the Oracle or SQL environment

SKILLS & QUALIFICATIONS PREFERRED:

• Experience with JDBC or ODBC
• Experience with UNIX
• Experience with stored procedures, CGI, Access
• Experience with MVC, web services, SOAP, and xml
• Experience using Jbuilder or Eclipse

This was not sent to me by a client, I just pulled this off a job board as an example of what I frequently run across.  Notice the repetitive verbiage and "atleast" typo?  That's how much thought can go into this very important aspect of marketing an organization to potential employees.

I've been authoring and editing job descriptions for years, and am always experimenting with different styles.  Yesterday it seems I crossed the line from informative / creative to lame.  At least that's what I'm starting to sense from the audience I'm trying to reach.

Based on the feedback I've gotten so far, and on some other things I've been reading, this description I wrote is lame.  And that's cool with me - I'd rather make mistakes trying to make something happen than be like everyone else.  After talking to a few people I trust and respect, and going through this thread from a developer forum, I make this solemn pledge - no more job postings for a "Rock Star Ninja Warlock from Mars" (unless I need to hire Charlie Sheen at some point).

Which brings me back to what's important in a job description.  If I was looking for a job I'd want the posting to 'pitch' me a bit.  Give me a little flavor of what I could expect doing the job and what the company thinks is important.  Of course I'd want some qualifications, but if your description leads me to believe you aren't interested in hiring me because I don't have X amount of years of experience, or specific hands-on expertise with some obscure piece of software you happen to be using (even though its EXACTLY like something I use every day) I'm going to be turned off.

So my question to you is what do YOU want to see when you read a job description.  In general, what types of things spark your interest and what turns you off?